


Just Because

by Soulstarsinger (soulstar)



Series: Staring at the Sun [2]
Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Light Angst, POV Buffy Summers, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1999-10-28
Updated: 1999-10-28
Packaged: 2018-02-08 14:16:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1944312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soulstar/pseuds/Soulstarsinger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Buffy deals with what happened in "Fire In Your Eyes".</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Because

**Author's Note:**

> To Luna, Ivy, Talion, Emilie, and Jo, who all asked for more.... there wasn't going to be a sequel, but then you lot suggested it and then the idea grew. :-) It's all your fault!! And also Beth, who was lovely enough to check my "American" speech for me, and provided the vase when I was stuck... *g*  
> DISCLAIMER: All the _Buffy_ stuff belongs to Joss and the other people that own it.

He makes me so angry. I don't understand him at all. Except that I do. I wish he'd leave me, go back to his psycho ho. But he won't, he can't even if he wanted to. And he says he doesn't. I feel like I'd die without him. Oh God, I nearly killed him tonight. It was so close. What the hell was he playing at?

I won't look back, I'm not going to see if he's following me. What if he isn't? What if he's angry I didn't trust him. What if he _does_ leave me? It would all be my fault.... wait, no it wouldn't! It's his fault. Oh, he makes me so mad! I don't want him to leave. I don't know if I can stand him staying. He _should_ leave. I'll kill him if he does. I can't believe he let me nearly stake him. I'd rather he was with someone else than dead. I think.... I'm so confused.

If he's not following me, he won't be able to see me now. I wipe tears from my face. This whole thing is impossible. Ridiculous that my mortal enemy-turned-ally has become so much more. But we were doing OK. We fight, but it's fun. Not like this. And I'm not sure what we are any more.

Now I'm back at the Bronze. Guess I should go back in. And I won't look over my shoulder. Don't know if it would be worse if he was there, or if he wasn't. When I join the others, I smile and laugh, but I know that they know something is wrong. I can see it in their eyes, but no-one says anything. Wills smiles and lays a hand briefly on my arm. Xander wants to do the protective male thing, and Anya is radiating hostility on my behalf. It's sweet, really. But it doesn't help. I dance away from them a little. A few moments later, a pair of arms slide round me. I can't help myself, I lean back into his embrace and my anger dissolves. I should be stronger than this. But I'm not.

I twist in his arms so I'm facing him.

"I'm sorry, baby." he murmurs in my ear. I close my eyes, shaking my head. I know he's not apologising for biting that man, but it doesn't matter now. I melt into him and feel my misery fade away. What's wrong with me? "Let's go home, Buffy." his voice is a seductive purr.

I could forgive him anything as he bends to kiss me. Until I taste the coppery tang in his mouth. I jerk back and pull free of him.

"Yes." I snap "Let's." Misery has given way to good clean anger again. And I know he's pleased to see it. I grab his arm and jerk him in the direction of the door. I see Willow grinning at Oz out of the corner of my eye, and firmly ignore them. Xander takes half a step, then stops, but by then we're at the door. I glare at Spike to go ahead of me. He gives me that annoying grin and saunters out into the night.

We make it back to his apartment in record time. I slam the door behind us. "What were you doing? Trying to get yourself staked?!" He just shrugs, a small smile playing round his mouth, cockiness returned in full force.

"Like I said, love, the opportunity was there." Snorts "The moron tried to rob me. Bet he won't be doing that again." He shoots me a sideways look. "I was just teaching him a little lesson. You weren't supposed to see."

"Which makes it OK, of course. You stupid bastard! I nearly staked you... you weren't fighting me. Didn't you know what I thought? Why didn't you explain?"

"Where's the excitement in that? Anyway, I wouldn't want to hurt you, love." I stare at him in disbelief, feeling my fury mount still further. I begin to stalk towards him. He doesn't move and I stop just short of him.

"You did it for _excitement_ " I'm trying to stop my voice from trembling, but it's not really working. To cover up, I smack him in the chest. "And what makes you think you _could_ hurt me? You... you... arrogant.... vampire!"

He laughs out loud at that, and before I can think I pull back and punch him. His head snaps back, and he automatically retaliates, sending me skidding away from him a little. It gives me room to deliver a roundhouse kick, and we fall into a pattern of strike and parry, back and forth. This time he gives as good as he gets. We've sparred together so often - for practice or through anger - we know each other's weaknesses. By the time I manage to get under his guard, we both have a dozen minor injuries. I press my advantage and slam him back against a bookcase. As he rights himself, it wobbles dangerously, and suddenly a vase falls from the top... and hits him square on the head. It smashes, and he's abruptly drenched in rank smelling water. He staggers a little, puts one hand to his head, then brings it away covered in gross slimey stuff. I can't help it - I start to giggle. He has mouldy bits of leaves on his shoulders, and it's the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. The expression on his face too..... I'm clutching my stomach, howling with laughter, partly in reaction to my recent anger. He starts to grin, then laugh, and flicks a piece of slime at me. Ugh! He moves towards me, but I dodge away. I still can't stop laughing. Running a hand over his face, he grimaces, and heads for the bathroom instead. I perch on the back of the couch, still grinning as I hear the running water.

He emerges, wet still, but de-slimed, and takes my hands.

"Better now, pet?" I lean into him, nodding. I hate being scared like that, but he always knows how to bring me out of it. Even when he's the cause. He kisses my forehead, smooths back my hair. "I tell you, pet, you should've seen the expression on that bloke's face.... priceless!"

I sigh. "You still shouldn't do stuff like that...."

"No harm done... luckily for me..."

I smack his arm.

"I don't know why I put up with you."

He leers at me. "I do." he whispers as his lips meet mine.

I pull away and grin at him. "Yeah. Just because."

END


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